"this is the end"

"i  still don't think one could stab oneself in the heart, I could shoot myself in the head but I don't think people have the ability to actually stab themselves in the heart and die of it. That last twist needs an external force. the action that kills you cannot happen at the same time as the death itself." 

"one could stab oneself in the heart, sometimes contemplating departure is staring at the knife, sometimes the last twist of the knife is i never loved you, it could be i'm leaving your father.  i cheated on you. it could be this is the end of loving you, goodbye. 

yes, you could stab yourself in the heart. and be guaranteed to not be able to return. and it's even harder this way, you live to grieve your own death. many times over."

PS: a few times this week the controversy around Elliot Smith's death came up in our conversations at work! this is what happens when you play to punk music on speakers at work!